March come in like a lion

I am someone who did not like changes.period

Without changes, life, albeit boring, is predictable

Life, without changes, is safe.

changes are chaotic. you have to adapt to it. you have to make more changes * shiver*  because of the changes that happened before that. it's like a catalyst. when something changes, it promised of more changes to come , never ending, never taking a break.

Hence, the old me( and sometimes the now-me), coward as I am, dreaded it

Hari tu saya telefon mama. Anak sulung dia ( my one and only older sister) baru selesai menikah.  Itu adalah the second wedding this year( dan tahun-tahun sebelumnya )untuk keluarga kecil cikgu adnan. Dan saya yang tak berada di sana for both of the wedding, like the good daughter I am telefon mama to show that I do care. Tak berada di rumah sekurang-kurangnya, mengelakkan saya dapat soalan cepu cemas macam “kamu bila lagi”. At least ada silver lining dari situasi farhah-tak-dapat-cuti-dan-tak-pegi-majlis-kawin-kakak-dan-adik-dia.

Well

Tahun ni raya saya tak dapat balik. adik saya spend her first raya dekat rumah mak mentua dia. My sister is getting married on the third day of raya, dan ada probability yang tinggi dia akan raya rumah husband dia jugak taun depan( well or any raya I mean I wont be back on raya haji either, sapa pun yang akan ada dekat rumah on raya lagi lepas ni???) 

*Nafas panjang* trying not to be hysterical

Entahlah..tiba-tiba macam ada something yang rasa mengganjal.. it kept bothering me.. rasa tu..

Mungkin rasa takut kot..dengan perubahan yang datang. Yang mana adik-beradik saya start to have their own life. Some stranger just become an important part of their life.Their own family.. apart from us..the old one. Separated.

Maybe ,, I felt a tad bit lonely

Haha

Drama

But it’s good changes, walaupun saya tak sepenuhnya terima perubahan tu. Tapi secara rasionalnya ia adalah perubahan yang bagus. Sesuatu yang semua orang akan lalui. I cannot prevent the future, and I cannot rewind the past. So the next logical thing to do is embrace it, rite??

Well, changes are good. It indicate growth etc..etc. we cannot stay the same all the time. It’s not possible to stay the same.  Changes introduce you to new things, new challenges, the unknown. 

you might be playing it safe by staying the same, tapi you denied  all the happinesss that come with the changes..kan??

This feel like a pep talk gone wrong( haha)

Anywayyyyy

Barakallah..my dear sisters

I wish you all the happiness in this world and the hereafter. I will always be your beloved sister, now and forever, because before he become your family, i have been one first.

Though all the changes comes like a turbulence, roaring like a lion.. I hope in the end it will end soft and fluffy, gentle as a lamb. ( tak tau la proverb ni sesuai ke tak, its something yang cakap pasal weather in march actually. Chaotic at the start, but nice in the end)